Its hard to believe it's been 14 years since we lost you on Mother's Day 2008. I think about you often and know you would have loved meeting your grandchildren and your grand niece and new grand nephew. I hold the memories of your life close and am touched that your students are still reaching out; your short life made such a difference .

11 years... how has it been 11 whole years, dad? It feels like just yesterday I was sitting in the audience watching Sallies performances of Hello Dolly or Fiddler on the Roof while you conducted the music, or I was just rolling around the hill behind you, while you conducted the marching band, and mom, the color guard. We were just living in NJ, stacking shelves for Entenmann’s in the summer between the school years, and having breakfast at Lucky diner, where you talked to the waiters and waitresses like you’ve known them forever, even if you just met. It was just yesterday we sang in choir together... and it feels like I was just walking aisle by aisle at car shows, where you told me everything you knew about cars from decades ago - I still wonder how you knew the exact years just by looking at them. So much has happened since the world lost you... I graduated high school, went to boot camp, became a Marine, traveled, met the love of my life (who also loves old cars, like you), we got married and we’ve had two beautiful boys, one was even named after you. I’ve also graduated college (soon to be for the second time), and while I know you wouldn’t miss any of it while sitting on your cloud, it has still been hard without you, dad. There have been times I have forgotten you’re gone, and I go to call your old Jersey phone number - how do I still remember it? There are times I know you’re with me, but some times I wish you were really here to help me and support me, like I know you would have. I wasn’t always the best kid, and I’d give anything to go back and be less selfish, more patient, less of a brat, and cherish the moments a little more. I just hope I can be half the parent you were to me. Never let my kids doubt how much they’re loved, always being there, teaching them, and leaving them with little life lessons in how you talk to and treat people. You were amazing, and I miss you every day... it’s been 11 years, and I still cry when I think about you. I love you, dad

It will be ten years since my husband Chris's death on May 11. Because this site might end, I am sharing more memories of him. This will be a catharsis for me. Chris left us behind, yet I am not alone. For I still feel the warmth of his deep and abiding love. Chris lifted my spirits and showed me how to embrace life. He was truly my soulmate and the love of my life. I adored him. Chris had many virtues which I greatly admired: his passion for music, particularly jazz; conducting his band and orchestra, and teaching; his unflagging wit and humor; his unwavering commitment to family, friends and others who counted on him; his mettle dealing with hardship and pain; his genuine interest in people; his belief that people were wonderful, and they should not be judged; and above all his steadfast devotion to his daughter Samantha. Chris possessed the high intellect of a man and the insatiable curiosity and wonder of a boy. He really was an exceptional man. Chris was the love of my life and I adore him still.

arots84 is Joy, Chris' beloved wife when he died.

Six years have passed since Chris' loved ones had to let him go. His sudden death left us all grief stricken and seared a hole through my heart. There was no better man. Chris embraced life to the fullest, while bearing his suffering stoically, even humorously. He was enthusiastic, brilliant, yet non-judgmental. He gave his heart to loved ones completely and unconditionally. His loyalties were deep and binding. Chris was truly the most fascinating man I have ever been blessed to know. Though married only two and one half years, we loved each other consummately. Our song was "The Sweetheart Tree" which he sang to me so lovingly. There can be no one else for me. Elizabeth Barrett Browning expresses our enduring love for each other in the words of her sonnet 43, written to Her soul mate, Robert Browning, shortly before their marriage. HOW DO I LOVE THEE. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the depth and breadth and height My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight For the ends of being and ideal grace. I love thee to the level of every day’s Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light. I love thee freely, as men strive for right. I love thee purely, as they turn from praise. I love thee with the passion put to use In my old griefs, and with my childhood’s faith. I love thee with a love I seemed to lose With my lost saints. I love thee with the breath, Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose, I shall but love thee better after death. And I do, Chris.

Now, 15 years since I graduated from Padua, I still think of Chris Arots as the one teacher who inspired me to pursue my dreams. He made those awkward years a little easier by filling them with music, and through that I figured out who I wanted to be. I still miss this man. I wish I was able to tell him how much he impacted my life.

So, I'm at a point in my life where I have a husband, and a child of my own. I am now out of the Marine Corps, and my husband, Ryan, recently reenlisted. We live in North Carolina now, but we will be moving to California at the end of the month. I never thought my dad wouldn't have walked me down the aisle. I never thought my dad wouldn't have seen me graduate high school, or boot camp, or even college. I never thought my dad wouldn't be able to meet his first, and quite possibly only grandchild. He would have loved Ryan (my husband), and Vinson (my son) would have been the apple of his eye. I see so much of my dad in my husband, and it's sad to say, but I guess that's why I married him lol! Between the isms, the dedication to the classics, the love of old cars... Ryan's almost like an echo of my dad. It's taken me a very long time to be able to come to terms with his loss. The first time I truly cried was in 2011, and here I am, shedding more tears. Probably because I reunited with his sisters, my aunts Betsy and Barbie. It was really nice to see them, as I hadn't seen them since my dad's funeral. I just don't want him to go unforgotten, because in my heart, I know he never will. My mom and I recall memories of the three of us... and now I can share those memories with my son. I miss you dad, like you'll never believe. I think about you every day, and I pray that, wherever you are, you can see me and smile. I hope I make you proud, dad. I love you, your little girl

Well is has been 5+ years since I last saw Chris. Last week at my 20 year reunion weekend I sat in with the Marching band one last time. I am selling my last sax and retiring from music officially. While sitting in the stands with my wife (former Sallies Marching Band flag girl) I felt at peace about a lot of things. I thought of Chris and how he did truly impact my life. He was one of the only teachers at Sallies that saw my potential. He cared for me I know, and when I saw he right before he passed away I still felt his caring. He was the leader of the family I came to love in the band. He made me feel like I had a place in the world. If not for him things in my life would be so very different. I know I was a huge pain in his butt, but he reciprocated the pain to me too. I truly did miss seeing his face last week in those stands. I never would have thought he would not be a part of that band forever. He was a good man, a gentle man, and man that would take whatever time needed to help you. Although time has passed I still can hear him telling me that it will be ok. It is OK Mr. Arots, It was a struggle, but I came out just fine. Thank you for all you did. I just wish my son could have met you in the band this year.

I'm sorry to be sending this so late (3+ years after Chris passed away, but I felt the need to express my thoughts. I was, of course, shocked and saddened by the news that Chris was no longer with us. He came to Salesianum after I had graduated, but I had the privelege of playing under his direction in some alumni musical groups, and in the Brandywine Pops. I came to appreciate not only his musicianship, but also his sense of humor and ready smile. Like some others, I was unwilling to accept the "new" band director at Sallies at first, after Father Spragg's long tenure, but Chris put up with me, and after he had to suffer my hardheadedness for too long a time, we became friends, and I'm glad I had the chance to know Chris. I just wish he hadn't left us so soon. Frank Gerace Salesianum class of '76

Mr. Arots was a great person. He made music fun. I will never forget making fun of the actors on stage when we were members of the pit orchestra. His life was music, and I can't imagine all of the personal sacrifice he made for his students. Thank you for everything Mr. A. You will be missed.

Chris...many memories of you and the life we shared together will live on in my heart and in my mind forever....we were torn by the challenges we faced yet we both know that the love we shared would always live in our hearts...we created a life together and i see so much of you in her in so many ways....my heart will always be saddened that you had to leave but you are with your God and with your mom and you are at peace....the world is empty without your presence but i am sure you are singing in the heavens...your heart is at peace and my heart is at peace for you...everlasting love sandi

I just found this memorial by "googling". Chris and I lived next door to each other in Fairfax. We were "sandbox buddies"...only a week apart in age...I being the "cougar"! We were inseparable thru age 8. Attenede St. Mary Magdalen school...our 1st grade nun wouldn't let us sit next to each other...we talked too much:) I moved to N.C. in 3rd grade but wea laways sent each other birthday cards....then letters in high school. Phone calls kept us in touch...we attended each others weddings.We both loved cars both new and old. of any kind...he was so excited when for me when I worked at G.M. He loved his music more than anything...I'm sure he is leading the band upstairs...Mary Ellen Clayton Molnar

Your Dad - how extraordinary he was... I was a poor kid from Browntown and my Dad graduated from Sallies. I didn't really have an outlet for music or performance at St E's. So, one summer day, I called your dad and asked to audition for the band front. He watched me, oh so politely twirl a Woolworth's baton to the theme from The Greatest American Hero alone in the gym one afternoon. I think now, that he got such a kick from my tenacity that I made the majorette squad. I was WAY out of my league with those more skilled, better costumed gals from other schools. He never made me feel inferior and in fact was probably surprised to learn that I took 2 city busses everyday after school to get to practice. I stuck with it and performed in other venues at Sallies. I went on to a successful musical theater career of Broadway National Tours, Choreography and Direction. I will NEVER forget his support and I am truly sorry for your loss. You should know what that meant to a kid like me. All my best - Pattie Ford Wilcoxson

My dad was probably the msot understanding individual I have ever met. he made me strong; both my mom and my dad did. It's been a year and three days since his passing and yet it feels like it was just yesterday. i don't know how i made it through boot camp and mct and school and now i'm in japan. i know my dad is watching over me. i think about him everyday. something always reminds me of him, whether it be a song or the way someone says something or a movie, anything. my dad is always with me and i will never let him go. i love you dad.

today i stood at your headstone in silent prayer remembering all of our life together...the good, the bad, the happy, the sad...when you left, a big part of my life went with you...although we were apart, we were still in love and we both knew that..my heart will cherish our memories and you will always "LIVE ON" in the life of samantha and me...may you be blessed with eternal life...sandi

Almost a year later, and I just found out that Mr. Arots passed away! I am deeply saddened to hear that he is gone. I always challenged him- asking for new uniforms, wanting to change the music for the field show- but he was a good man taken much too soon! Melanie Ann Timney Reyne, Padua Academy Class of 1993, Alto Sax- Concert Band, Wind Ensemble,and Marching Band 1989-1993.

I'm very sad to learn of the passing of Chris Arots. Not only was Mr. Arots my music teacher at Sallies (Jazz Band '87 - '89), but also my guidance counselor, home room teacher (for two years), and morning bus driver! I do not have a memory of high school that does not involve Mr. Arots in some way. He inspired me to major in music and make it a permanent part of my life. I will cherish my memories of his wit, dry sense of humor, and hilarious sarcasm (I could tell some stories!) forever. God bless the Arots family. Brian "Biscuit" Becker Salesianum Class of 89

I am not sure to whom to address this, but I just received the information that Chris Arots died recently. My heart goes out in particular to Joseph Arots, to Joy Arots, to Samantha Arots. Joe, you may remember me, as I had a close relationship with Chris in 2004-2005. Losing a child is a great sorrow. Today happens to be the third anniversary of the death of my husband's younger son, Ned Bradak, from an incurable genetic disease, and I see Gary's grief. I pray for God's consolation to you. You were so kind to me, Joe, when I joined the Catholic Church in 2005. You are in my prayers. Joy, you did not have very long with your husband. My sense was that Chris very much needed "joy" in his life, and then YOU came into it. I hope the two of you created many good memories together. You are also in my prayers. Samantha, you were very dear to me. I didn't know you for long, but I treasured you. I will always remember seeing you perform with the children's choir in Turandot, your help and fashion sense in assisting me to choose a fancy dress, and your own sorrow when you were struggling over your relationship with Mickey. I hope your family holds you close and that you can express your feelings through your art. Betsy, I remember the colors in your home. That freedom and beauty inspired me to choose vivid color in the home my husband Gary and I bought in Utah. Barbie, I know that your brother loved you and your kids very much. He struggled with his own demons; he now is free. Gary and I were in London and Paris for two weeks recently, and upon my return I got the news of Chris' death from two former bandmates in Cape May County NJ. One of the things we did while in Paris was go to Mass at the Cathedral of Notre Dame, and we prayed there. May our prayers and those of others be of some comfort at this hard time. God bless us, everyone. Linda Foster Bradak, 75 Canterbury Circle, Logan UT 84321

chris and i may have been divorced but the love we shared as a couple and a family is a love that will continue to live in my heart and the memories that we created will never be forgotten. chris was a very devoted father...seeing to samantha's needs and especially her "wants". the relationship we continued to have outside of the marriage was one that only samantha, chris, and i will ever know or understand. my heart is aching that you are truly gone but i promised you that i will take care of samantha and love her for the both of us. you were my first love and the love i have for you will always be alive in me and in the love i have for samantha. i knew you better than most... you will be sadly missed...we will meet again forever in my heart, sandi

My fondest memories of high school and school in general are from my time in the various Salesianum bands. Mr. Arots made that time fun and rewarding. He will be missed greatly by all of us that ever spent time in the band. Brian Hougentogler

I just learned of Mr. Arot's passing this morning. I am deeply saddened for his daughter, Samantha, and the rest of his family. I, myself, lost my father 4 years ago and I know how hard it is to lose such a great person in your life. I remember little baby Samantha venturing with us to our competitions and our trip to New Orleans. Mr. Arot's wanted his little girl to be a big part of the life he had so much passion for. I was in the Sallies marching band from 1990 to 1994 and one of his drum majors in 1994. I loved working with Mr. Arot's. He gave me the courage and the determination to be the best leader for the band and I couldn't ask for a better music teacher. Thank you Mr. Arots for a great 4 years! Felicia Jones ('90-'94)

Mr. Arots was my music teacher at Sallies from 1984-1986. I will most remember his commitment and sense of humor. He made it fun. The musicals produced at Sallies during that time were especially good due to his musical teaching abilities. May he rest in peace with God's love. LtCol Jim Sahm, USAF Salesianum, 1986

Mr. Arots was an awesome teacher and made music fun for everybody. I was at Sallies from 91-95, where I played Saxophone. Between Jazz band, Wind Ensemble, and Marching Band, I spent a lot of time with him, both in the classroom and on the road. He was a huge influence and a really positive part of high school life for me. It was such a great time going on those trips for Marching Band competitions, they are some of my happiest memories of that time, and Mr. Arots is the one who made it all happen. Mr. Arots, you are very missed. I will never forget you.

I was only with Mr. Arots for a short time - 1991 - 1995 - my high school career, and during that time he changed my life. He was always the nicest, FUNNIEST, most caring, and loving man, probably that I ever met in my life. I was in the Beginning Band, Concert Band, Wind Ensemble, Jazz Band, and Marching Band and all because of Mr. Arots. I remember Senior year I even dropped my Physics class, so I could have 3 band classes a day instead of just 2. I came to Salesianum playing the trumpet, but Mr. Arots quickly got me to switch to Baritone and then the Euphonium (which was his instrument). He even let me play the Euphonium that he played because I couldn't afford to buy my own. Mr. Arots inspired me to be a better person and to go to University of Delaware as a Music Education Major. I love you Mr. Arots, and I will never forget you.

Mister Arots was always the first person outside of the house I saw in the morning throughout high school - because he drove the Sallies bus for Claymont and north Wilmington. I'm not sure exactly how long he drove the bus for, but I know that he also drove it the whole time my brother went to Sallies from '84 to '88. After years of discussing music with Mister Arots, I broke down and decided to go into Beginning Band at Sallies on the clarinet and was able to move into the Wind Ensemble my senior year. He also let me clean up the band closet area as my Eagle Scout project for the Boy Scouts of America (if I remember correctly, he told me he made it all the way up to Star in BSA himself.) Mister Arots, I'm sure you're in a better place now. Know that you have multiple students who are greatful for the impact you had on their lives. Sean Patrick McBriarty Salesianum, Class of 1995

I have known Chris since he was Barbie's little brother. He always had a sparkle and a special love of life. When he would see you, he made you feel that your presence made his day. We will all miss him. Pat Strocko

Thank you for the four wonderful years in the Sallesianum high school band from 9/89 to 6/92! You will be missed Mr. Arots.

Another talented classmate gone. I was in the band with Chris at Brandywine High School - his choice of career was no surprise. Bless Chris and his family, he will live on in our memories. John Scoggin BHS Class of '71

I was saddened to read about Mr. Arots' death. His first year at Sallies (Sept 1976) I was a freshman at Padua and in the Sallies Marching Band. He made music fun. I continued to be in his program until graduation and also at the U of D. Now my children play in their parochial school band and I am hoping they continue in high school. Thank you, Mr. Arots, for laying the music groundwork for me and through me to my children. Sally Casey Banas

Chris, I can't believe you are gone! You were always so vibrant and active. Please know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I know this is a very difficult time for Joy and Samantha. I remember all the good times we had at Sallies. I thank you for all you did for my son Jeff. You inspired him and helped him to mature into a good musician and a leader of others. I thank you for your friendship over the years together at Salesianum, 22 for you and 25 for me. Sallie also sends her love and prayers as does our children Jeff, Gregg, and Kelly. Thank you also for all you did for my daughter Kelly. You helped her to come out of herself and blossom in the band front. She went on to Kutztown University and was the captain of the marching band front there. You were an inspiration and a hard worker who always put the students first. You will be missed by so many whom you have touched. I am so sorry we lost touch over the past few years. After leaving Salesianum we both went in different directions. I will always remember your friendship and our love of marching bands. We didn't always agree but I always respected you. Please pray for all of us as you now enjoy the rewards promised by Our Lord, Jesus. Be happy up there and keep the music playing! Love and prayers, Tom Miller and family

Mr. Arots, I just found out and I'm so upset. You were an amazing band instructor and I adored you so much. You had such character and charm, and you're own unique sense of humor. I just wish I got to say goodbye. :/

Mr. Arots taught a lot of us at Sallies the art of making music. Now he's with God's band teaching the low brass section. We are better people because of him.

all i can say is i miss my dad more than anything right now. he was too good of a person

Thank you for setting up this memorial to Christopher Arots. We hope that you find it a positive experience developing the site and that it becomes a place of comfort and inspiration for you to visit whenever you want or need to.

I am I and you are you, whatever we were to each other that we still are. Speak to me in the easy way which you always used. Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight? Life means all that it ever meant, it is the same as it ever was.