samantha14carotsCole 11th May 2019

11 years... how has it been 11 whole years, dad? It feels like just yesterday I was sitting in the audience watching Sallies performances of Hello Dolly or Fiddler on the Roof while you conducted the music, or I was just rolling around the hill behind you, while you conducted the marching band, and mom, the color guard. We were just living in NJ, stacking shelves for Entenmann’s in the summer between the school years, and having breakfast at Lucky diner, where you talked to the waiters and waitresses like you’ve known them forever, even if you just met. It was just yesterday we sang in choir together... and it feels like I was just walking aisle by aisle at car shows, where you told me everything you knew about cars from decades ago - I still wonder how you knew the exact years just by looking at them. So much has happened since the world lost you... I graduated high school, went to boot camp, became a Marine, traveled, met the love of my life (who also loves old cars, like you), we got married and we’ve had two beautiful boys, one was even named after you. I’ve also graduated college (soon to be for the second time), and while I know you wouldn’t miss any of it while sitting on your cloud, it has still been hard without you, dad. There have been times I have forgotten you’re gone, and I go to call your old Jersey phone number - how do I still remember it? There are times I know you’re with me, but some times I wish you were really here to help me and support me, like I know you would have. I wasn’t always the best kid, and I’d give anything to go back and be less selfish, more patient, less of a brat, and cherish the moments a little more. I just hope I can be half the parent you were to me. Never let my kids doubt how much they’re loved, always being there, teaching them, and leaving them with little life lessons in how you talk to and treat people. You were amazing, and I miss you every day... it’s been 11 years, and I still cry when I think about you. I love you, dad